Happy First Birthday Silas
January 4, 2017 by Selvin Ortiz
The days went slow, the year went fast. I’m not sure it adds up, but that’s how it feels!
One minute we’re giving you the first bath at home, the next minute your a one year old.
I’m still not sure how we got here!
Things I learned in a year #
Today started out like most days in the past year, with mommy and daddy tired from lack of sleep because of a very active baby. Yeah, you know who!
It has not been easy, but I would not change a thing, you are a gift, and I’m excited to see what God has planned for you.
You are in the top percentile developmentally, and that makes things a little harder on us because you learn quickly, you remember a lot of stuff, and you’re very active.
All of that adds up to lots of play time and little sleep.
The good thing is that you have the best mommy in the world and a dad that will do his best not to let her do all the work. We’re a good team!
Here are a few things I would tell myself if I could go back a year.
1. Get through the day in chunks #
Having a detailed plan for the day is not realistic! You can plan out your whole day in detail, but the only thing that you can count on is that your plans and expectations will melt under the heat of your baby’s needs.
So, do the wise thing and go with the flow of the day if you can. Work a couple of hours in the morning, have flexibility for play time during lunch break, be ready to work at night to make up for lost time if needed.
No matter what, be flexible with your schedule, have realistic expectations, and be prepared to leave it all on the field.
2. Watch everything you do in front of your baby #
Picking your nose might be funny now, but when he’s old enough, and he starts doing it, mommy won’t be happy.
You will be your baby’s first and most influential role model, so model accordingly.
It doesn’t mean you get to raise a robot; it just means that you get to expose your baby to the right things.
The most important thing to remember is that:
Using common sense and not always seeking the easy way out, tends to be a good starting point.
3. Remember that you have a breaking point #
Stories are floating around that, in war, recordings of babies crying are used as a form of torture. Think about that for a minute!
A baby’s cry can be the sweetest, most moving thing to experience but hear it long enough and you’ll want to rip out your eardrums.
Sleep regression is the most amazing thing in the world. Said nobody in their right mind, ever.
Your baby will cry, your baby will whine, your baby will take forever to fall asleep, your baby will wake up at the sound of silence, your baby will pee and poop at the worst time, etc.
Just know that you and your wife need a break and that together, working as a team, you can get through it.
4. Rest when the baby rests #
You may be tempted to get right back to work after your baby falls asleep in mommy’s arms but if you haven’t gotten enough sleep, you should take a quick nap.
Rest even if you’re behind at work because you’ll be more productive when rested. Trust me on this one!
5. Don’t be lazy and be thankful #
Do not pretend to be asleep when the baby needs changing at night nor take longer than necessary in the bathroom.
Grow a pair and help your wife, you’ll have time to be lazy when you retire. Hopefully, you’ll make wise decisions so that you can retire. More on that in another article.
Be thankful to your wife for everything that she does, because she does more than you’ll ever realize.
6. Understand your role #
You were always good at knowing your place but this baby might throw your radar off, so be careful.
Do not try to take over when your wife has reached her breaking point. It’s better to ask "how can I help?" and let her fight that battle.
Do not take your sweet time when she taps you in; she’s not a wimp or as lazy as you, she’ll tough it out as long as she can. When she calls, you jump!
Don’t ever think that you know your baby better than your wife does, her intuition, previous battles, and countless hours of research before, during and after birth make her profoundly more qualified than you. She’s raised a boy before for crying out loud.
She is the boss; you are the laborer. Suck it up and be the best laborer you can be!
Are you reading this, Silas? #
If you are, I want you to know that I love you with all my heart. You make me want to do better and work harder every day!
Please, thank your brother when you see him because he played a huge role in training me to be the awesome dad that I am today:)
Happy First Birthday Son, I love you!